Midgets haven’t always been relegated to small roles (pun not intended), no, sometimes little people can have big impacts on the cast of a film (pun totally intended).  In these next 7 examples we’ll detail instances where dwarfs were not only included in the movie, but in numbers so large you’ll question whether size actually matters.

7-The Terror of Tiny Town


Raise your hand if you’ve ever thought that the biggest drawback of Western movies was the enormous height of the actors involved.  Actually, don’t waste all that energy raising your hand, because if there is one thing the entire world can agree on, it’s that we’re sick of seeing cowboys who look and sound like cowboys actually, and historically, looked and sounded.  Hollywood, grab a pad and pencil and take a couple of notes, because this info I’m about to drop (and by drop I mean the useless crap I’m about to shit out of my brain) is priceless.  You want to create a western that makes ten gagabillionzez of dollars, then use the genius Western, The Terror of Tiny Town as a palette, and start producing films with actors who, for safety reasons, can only ride Shetland ponies.  Then cut me a check for half of the gagabillionzez of dollars you stand to make.

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Twitter is latest of hot web 2.0 websites that celebrities have discovered and exploited for self promotion. Lord knows, they need another outlet to rub in our faces how much our lives suck versus theirs, right? While some celebrities still have yet to join the cult, others can't handle the stress of sending short, mundane updates to their fans. These nine celebs seem to have quit Twitter, and left their many fans in the dark.

9 - Summer Glau- Quit July 28, 2008

Summer Glau is one of the many darlings of the sci-fi world. With her roles in Serenity, Firefly, and Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, nerds have been fantasizing about her since she was a young girl. She started tweeting back in April of 2008 with geeky tweets like, "Spoiler alert! I am the twelfth Cylon model" and "I know I should post more often, but between the acting thing and the covert assassinations, there just isn't time." With the long working hours of an hour-long weekly drama, we're sure that she wanted to spend her down time with people she cared about. With Terminator now cancelled, perhaps Summer can devote some time to keeping fans abreast of her next move.

 

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Is there anything more satisfying than watching that dastardly villain suffer some horrible death at the end of a movie (the obvious answer is yes, but just run with me for a second)?  And the more painful said death is, the more enjoyment the viewer can glean. That’s why expiration via melting is such a popular way to terminate villains, because can you imagine a more painful way to go than getting liquefied (again, the obvious answer is yes, but I’m gonna ask you to roll with me once more)?  Here are the 8 most recognizable villains who perished by melting.
 

8-General Kala from Flash Gordon


In order to understand the motives and intentions of General Kala one must be fluent and proficient in the dialect of nerd.  If not, the following paragraph will make no sense.  Tasked with the responsibility of commanding all of the armies within the dictatorship of Mongo (a traveling and inhospitable planet that is ruled by the totalitarian tyrant, Emperor Ming), the beautiful and deadly General Kala is no stranger to vice and inexplicable evil.  This was detailed during the torture session of Princess Aura, where Kala, along with Klytus (a vile android who heads Ming’s secret police force), spared no sympathy when using the dreaded bore worms to torment the rebellious royalty.  However, her infinite wickedness was put to an end when Hans Zarkov managed to evade Kala’s laser barrage aboard his Hawkmen rocket-cycle, and put a fatal laser blast to her head, transforming her into a melted pile of black goo.  And if you managed to read and understand any of the preceding text, you probably have yet to fondle the mammary gland of a woman.

Melting occurs at 2:30

 

Putting on a few pounds during your life is a normal occurance, as injury, stress and sickness can cause weight gain for even the fittest of the fit. The world doesn't have most of you on speed dial, so your insecurity about your body is minimalized. With celebrities, however, all weight gain is met with morbid curiosity, especially when said celeb is known for being fit. Here's 8 instances of surprising celeb weight gain.

8-Eminem

The world held its collective breath when the Real Slim Shady was asked to please stand up, and then the New Stout Shady struggled to rise, not used to the new girth he'd acquired.  Unfortunately, this gave some of society's nastiest miscreants ammunition to coin new monikers for this now rotund rapper, including such tasteless titles as:  Almond Joy, 10,000 M&Ms, and Penis Breath.  When asked where this new weight had come from, Eminem replied, "I am whatever you say I am; if I wasn't, then why would you say I Om nom nom nom."  He then literally made good on his promise to eat up other rappers and spit them out, with the exception of then spitting them back out.
 

Film and TV producers often try to paint a character as a sympathetic, lovelorn person worth rooting for, not realizing that the character actually exhibits traits that could lead to arrest. Here are 8 beloved characters who are actually stalkers.

8-  Doug Funnie


Sure, Doug seemed harmless enough with his green sweater vest and gigantic cartoon nose, but was his fascination with Patti Mayonnaise really all that innocent? At first it seemed like a normal youthful crush, but over the years that Doug was on the air we were able to delve into the mind of Doug Funnie and see how far the obsession went. Doug displayed many classic stalker characteristics besides the whole, you know, constantly thinking about and trying to be around her. He kept a journal about their every minor interaction, drew pictures of her obsessively and had delusional daydreams about being various "heroes" she needed to be rescued by. And come on, with that outfit and his nearly bald head, Doug looks like your typical perm from To Catch a Predator anyway.

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Unlike Britain’s frumpy, singing-sensation, Susan Boyle, the majority of us have had significant others at one point or another.  And yet there are many of us that are still single (by no fault of our own, of course).  If only we could find a girlfriend who’s up to the high standards that film and TV have established, we could kiss loneliness goodbye forever.  With that in mind, here are the 12 girlfriend archetypes that keep us searching for Ms. Right.

12-Clementine Kruczynski from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind


It seems like only yesterday when we watched Leonardo DiCaprio paint a nude Clementine Kruczynski just before their boat hit an iceberg and sunk.  And in the 200 years that have past since the sinking of the Titanic (I didn’t major in history), Clementine got all crazy.  We can tell this by looking at her wacky clothes and her brightly colored hair, which indicate that this babe is most likely a freak in the sheets (I apologize for using that banal colloquialism).
 

It's a really big internet out there, and nobody should have to stop and wait for any website. Yet there are a handful that have been so beloved that fans will look the other way when error messages stare them in the face. Here are 6 awesome websites that often fail at working.

6- MySpace

While its awesomeness is rapidly depleting by the day, MySpace was once a giant in the online world, garnering the largest page hits on the web. However,  the Internet has moved forward, and MySpace has not. Its user interface has barely changed and the only major additions to that site have been an annoying clutter of ads. What also hasn't changed are the errors that occur when you do anything from posting messages on the bulletin board or pages loading funny because users have written bad html code. MySpace has become the equivalent of a Hummer during, say, an energy and global warming crisis. We don't even have to mention the rise of sites like FaceBook or Twitter that are stealing all of the proverbial thunder. You would think that the top guys at News Corp could be capable of doing more than creating skins for your homepage. But then again, News Corp is notorious for thriving on archaic thinking and shameless whoring coughFoxNewscough. With the recent announcement that even Tom is getting canned, we wonder if MySpace will be redesigned to reflect the current needs of the new generation of social networkers.

In Hollywood, limbs can be about as permanent as celebrity marriages.  And like those brief nuptuals, sometimes the replacement is better than the original.  Here are seven famous examples of movie prosthesis where the loss of a limb turned out just fine, if not better.

7-Frankenstein’s hand grenade from Death Race 2000

Our current president (a.k.a. the most evil, socialist monster ever) better think twice before he enacts his schemes to recreate the deadly road race found in the cult movie Death Race 2000.  If he does, he can expect one driver named Frankenstein to have a handshake that some might describe as dynamite (pun intended).  That’s because this enigmatic racer has a prosthetic hand that comes equipped with a deadly built-in grenade.   And if you enjoyed reading that first pun as much as I enjoyed writing it, you should know that this grenade, located on the hand, is cleverly called the hand grenade. Unfortunately, when it comes time for the President to congratulate Frankenstein on his fine racing with the symbolic gesture of a handshake, he will receive a shake that was designed to make people explode like the Death Star after it met Luke Skywalker.  And yes, the grenade hand does make it a bitch to play softball with Frankenstein.
 

The reality show judge is an interesting job. No discernable skill is required, so each judge must come up with a way to prove they actually deserve to judge the worth of other human beings. But no judge has had more success than Simon Cowell, a man that became famous for being a jerk and then seen as a loveable jerk because he is famous. So naturally every reality show judge wishes they could capture some of that Cowell charm. But some realllly want to.

6- Donald Trump



Sure, Donald Trump is one of the richest guys around. You think he'd be happy as is. But he seems to spend most of his time these days trying to prove what an opinionated jerk he can be (lest we forget his feud with Rosie), and that extends right into The Apprentice. He extends the the Simon Cowell brand of "brutal honesty" to the boardroom to let people know exactly how they failed during their tasks. Of course insulting someone's singing or looks to their face like Simon does is entertaining. Doing the same for how they managed their team while selling cupcakes isn't. Sorry Donald, keep trying. Kicking Chloe Kardashian off for having a DUI is a step in the right direction! 

With WrestleMania 25 sure to deliver some epic bouts tonight, we thought we'd highlight a handful of matches that were shorter than a television commercial. Here are 6 classic WWE matches that were under a minute long.

6- Hulk Hogan vs Yokozuna, WrestleMania IX

Man, you think with decades of managerial experience under his belt, Mr. Fuji would be a better decision-maker. After employing a handful of salt to help his protege Yokozuna defeat Bret Hart at WrestleMania IX, you think he'd allow some time for recovery and celebration. Not Fuji. Instead, he has to go and challenge Hulk Hogan the guy who defeated King Kong Bundy and Andre the Giant. And then he goes back to his same bag of salt tricks, which backfires and allows Hogan to easily beat the champ, giving Yoko the shortest WWE Heavyweight Championship reign of all time.